We’re already 18 years into the 21st century, and we’re still waiting on our personal jetpacks and flying cars. We don’t even have a colony on Mars, and the city that helped put a man on the moon is now telling its residents they can’t frequent robot sex brothels.

What a buzzkill.

Last week, the Houston City Council updated its rules on sexually oriented businesses, adding “anthropomorphic devices” to the list of banned “adult arcades,” which are prohibited from operating within 1,500 feet of churches, schools, day cares, parks, and residential neighborhoods. The council prohibited customers of sexually oriented businesses from using so-called arcade devices on company premises.

Houston, We Have a Problem

The city council’s action came in response to a Toronto-based company’s plans to open a store that would sell life-size, human-like “adult love dolls” made from synthetic skin which can run $3,000. KinkySdollS already runs what it calls the first SexDoll “rent before you buy” Spa in North America north of the border, and was planning a Houston location where customers could use the dolls in private rooms.

“I know there’s some people that will sit there and say, ‘What does the City of Houston have to do with any of this?'” councilman Greg Travis asked. “And the answer is ‘We’re not getting into your bedroom, but don’t bring it into our district. Don’t bring it into our city. This is not a good business for our city. We are not Sin City.'”

Missionary Control

“We’re not legislating morality here. That’s not what we’re doing,” Travis added. “We don’t care what people do in their bedrooms. If somebody wants to order these dolls and have them in their homes, it’s weird, that’s fine, they can do that.” Travis also said he planned to record the business’ patrons entering the building and shame them online, according to USA Today, which is pretty dang weird in itself.

So, we may have telephone watches and access to the whole of human knowledge in our pocket, but we’ll still have to go to Canada for all of our robot sex needs, apparently.

Related Resources: